Abusing Power

A well known fact is that the only reason to have power is to abuse it as much as you can. The natural reaction to obtaining power is to use it for personal gain at whatever expense is required.
That being said, there is a curve for the temptation of abuse. Here's a graph, because everyone loves graphs.

If you work in a job where your direct boss isn't present for example, you can take advantage of that situation by slacking off almost constantly and acting like doing work is a giant and unexpected hassle, and that the people asking you to perform your job duties are being rude. You can respond to their questions with anger and disdain. You can ignore their petty requests and chat up your friends in plain sight of the petitioner with total impunity. They probably don't even know who your boss is, so they won't complain. Besides, you're the only one that can answer their questions so they'll need to be nice to you no matter how unfair that is.


A lot of people abuse their power, but none quite so cruelly as the young person that got promoted over the more experienced workers. Here's a comic I wrote and my wife drew (backstory in the FAQ page).

A nineteen year old manager is not something you want. It's not something anyone wants, but it happens. They will demean you, and they will order you around. And there's nothing you can reasonably do and expect to keep your job and stay out of prison. NOTHING. You must endure the shame and despair. But not all is lost! After long enough, shame and despair will seem like old friends. And your pal cognitive dissonance will help you convince yourself that it's not so bad. I mean, other people have it way worse than you. Everything's fine! Hell, maybe it's great!


Even nice and well meaning people can be easily corrupted by power. Even if they don't turn totally evil, they will use their power to "make things better." The stumbling block here is that once they obtain power, they obviously know what's best and have the right ideas. Those ideas will be implemented. Even if there's tons of contradictory evidence that says their ideas are like rancid pig vomit, the power stuffed in their ears and clouding their eyes will prevent this information from reaching them. 
But never fear! Cognitive dissonance will still be there to comfort you!

Smiling With Your Eyes

A smile can mean many things, and a lot of what it means depends on what you're doing with your eyes at the time. I've said this to a few people who didn't really believe me, so as a public service announcement, I've whipped up some illustrations to prove my point. We'll start with happy:

This smile is super happy. It is completely genuine. This smile might be shown in response to a Christmas pony or an ice cream sundae that's as big as Idaho, or a similarly-sized state.

Conversely, there is this smile:

This smile is not happy. This is the displaying of teeth when socially obligated to do so. Notice how the eyes convey insincerity. If you're receiving this smile, it's probably not in earnest, and is likely mocking you inwardly or perhaps outwardly.

Moving on with negative-type smiles, there's this one:

This smile is happy, but not for any reason you're going to like. This smile says, "I'm going to harm you right now, and I'm really going to enjoy it." You don't want to receive this smile.

On the other side:

This smile is also not an honest smile. This one comes out when harm is on its way, like on the receiving end of the previous face. Or, in a lesser sense, this one can mean something along the lines of, "I'd actually hate to do that thing you're suggesting, but I'm pretty much hosed and have to anyway."

And finally, there's this:

This face is also honestly happy. It is displayed in response to a pleasing offer, either for sexytimes, or some sort of extreme challenge, like riding an elephant over a gorge.

I hope this has been helpful.

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Interpersonal Interaction

I don't care for talking to people when I'm out and about, so, over the years, I've cultivated an aura of "Don't Talk To Me." This is achieved through an emotionless, laconic manner in general, combined with active and obvious attempts to avoid direct eye contact.

This is most useful when walking through a Sam's Club on the weekends when there's a million sample stands. I just want to get what I came for, pay for those things, and leave. I don't want anything to hold me up from those simple tasks.

But no, I'm a dumbass and I went on a Friday or something stupid like that, so there's a plethora of cheery people trying desperately to initiate eye contact so they can peddle their greasy wares.

I am not interested in their greasy wares. I'm interested in buying my canned chicken and bulk salsa so I can get back to my Xbox.

This is when looking like an angry, brooding loner comes in handy. This is what I try and appear to be in public at all times:

On a side note, this is my first attempt with Paintbrush. I think it turned out well.

However

This mostly works for me. But there are times, rare times, when I want to act friendly to someone. Perhaps the cashier was super nice to the person in front of me, so maybe I'll just smile and say hello like a normal person for once.

However, I still look like the above picture, so this cashier, who was super friendly with the person right in front of me, will totally shut down and barely acknowledge that they're ringing up things for me. And I know they're friendly. I totally saw it.

So I feel bad. Am I also not deserving  of friendliness?

But I go home and that poor humor wears off almost immediately.
And because I thought it'd be funny, here's a picture of me frolicking with my Xbox in a field that has at least four flowers in it.